January 2010
115 posts
3 tags
“Please fire me. After telling staff we could no longer afford water, coffee or...”
5 tags
“Please fire me. I had to kick a homeless man out of the walk-in fridge.”
7 tags
“Please fire me. I just bought Kindles for the whole company.”
6 tags
“Please fire me. My boss asked if my New Year’s resolution was to do a...”
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“Please fire me. I just booked Valentine’s Day reservations for my boss at a...”
4 tags
“Please fire me. The drink machine went up to a $1.25.”
6 tags
“Please fire me. We had a “get to know you” business lunch at a very nice...”
5 tags
“Please fire me. I just caught my old boss copying down my goals from last year’s...”
7 tags
“Please fire me. I make spreadsheets of my favorite snack foods weekly and...”
4 tags
“Please fire me. My boss pooped her pants and asked to borrow my sweater to sit...”
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“Please fire me. One of my managers told me I was voted “Most Likely to Get...”
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“Please fire me. Today, I was taught how to scrub a counter top. This is the...”
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“Please fire me. My boss, the president of a family-owned business, asked me to...”
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“Please fire me. My boss just walked over and talked for 25 minutes about lead...”
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“Please fire me. I’m a housewife whose husband is screwing around on her. At...”
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“Please fire me. It is impossible to “install emails.” ”
3 tags
“Please fire me. Last Saturday, I gave myself a drinking and literacy test. I...”
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“Please fire me. My manager [mis]uses the phrase “feast or phantom”.”
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“Please fire me. My boss asked me to explain “That’s what she said” to him. I’m a...”
3 tags
“Please fire me. I’ve been working here for a year. Since then, my last two...”
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“Please fire me. One of my bosses just accused me of allegedly tapping her...”
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“Please fire me. My boss insists I call him “Emperor”.”
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“Please fire me. I work in a mental institution for the criminally insane and a...”
2 tags
“Please fire me. Before hiring me at this job, my boss insisted that I change my...”
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“Please fire me. Our computer that tests the chemical levels of your pool water...”
5 tags
“Please fire me. I sometimes lock myself in a dressing room, take a nap on the...”
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“Please fire me. I work for NBC.”
4 tags
“Please fire me. Yesterday, I was drunk and having fun watching the playoffs....”
4 tags
“Please fire me. I get paid to listen to small children sing show tunes. I...”
1 tag
“Please fire me. Every time my phone rings/vibrates when I’m not at work, I hope...”
3 tags
“Please fire me. I am going blind from staring at a computer all day. I just went...”
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“Please fire me. I’m self-employed and don’t have the nerve to fire myself.”
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“Please fire me. I mastered this job in three months. That was three years ago. I...”
2 tags
“Please fire me. My employer recently stenciled great motivational phrases all...”
2 tags
Please fire me. I mean, when you have to call a guy who’s name rhymes with Moose Boris to get advice, it’s pretty pathetic.
3 tags
“Please fire me. I am a substitute teacher at the mercy of screaming, lying...”
2 tags
“Please fire me. Our owner thinks I enjoy wasting his money, so he demands detail...”
1 tag
“Please fire me. I’ve written four bestselling novels at my desk in the past two...”
“PleaseFireMe.com featured on Business Pundit”
2 tags
“Please fire me. My boss keeps asking me to quantify social media.”
1 tag
“Please fire me. I actually AM the boss, and every day when someone whines I...”
1 tag
“Please fire me. They’re sending me to Albany for a week.”
2 tags
“Please fire me. Because no kid ever said, “When I grow up, I want to be a...”
4 tags
“Please fire me. My boss just called me a JAP.”
3 tags
“Please fire me. I didn’t get my CDL to spend all day driving trucks.”
4 tags
“Please fire me. My manager meeting just ended with, “Heather, try harder...”
2 tags
“Please fire me. I got assigned to be a TA for a class that meets Monday...”
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“Please fire me. I rarely have violent ideations except for when I’m at work, in...”
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“Please fire me. I spent entirely too long figuring out the correct insurance...”
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“Please fire me. My boss thinks he’s a hipster but he’s actually just an aging,...”