PFM Hero of the Week: Unidentified Co-Worker of Michael Kevin Lallana

There’s something in the water and it’s the baby batter of co-worker Mr. Lallana. According to KTLA, a man has been arrested for putting semen in a co-worker’s water bottle. Twice.

Tragically, even though our unidentified hero discovered her co-worker added a free protein shot to her unattended water bottle once, no one sawing it coming that he’d do it again.

If Mr. Lallana is convicted, he could go to jail for up to three years with mandatory sex offender registration. Soon he could be singing the words of The Doors, “Love me two times, girl. I’m going away.”

The only advice we can give to our hero, who most certainly does not appreciate this loving environment, is to bring her water bottle with her the next time she is out of the office.