The PFM Book

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Please fire me. I had a customer tell me that his deceased wife’s bill should have been paid off by God when she died. My response? “I apologize sir but we do not receive payments from God.” He did not believe me.

Please fire me. Just because I work at a gas station doesn’t mean you can constantly hit on me and think I’m easy. And, NO, buying me the chocolate bar I just dusted isn’t going to work either.

Please fire me. I work at a call center and at least once a day a customer will have a full conversation with me and when I tell them I can take there payment over the phone they start pressing buttons in my ear… Um, you have to READ your card numbers to me they don’t magically come through the phone.

Please fire me. I work for a grocery store where a woman threw a fit until I gave her the difference for the soda she was overcharged the day before. She proudly walked away with an extra 20 cents in her pocket.

Please fire me. I work at Subway and was making two sandwiches at once, both were toasted and I toasted each seperately. I had just finished toasting the first one and set it on the counter, then turned and prepared to do the same to the other. In that 3 seconds the first customer complained “So she’s just going to let my sub get cold!” Like he couldn’t wait the 3 seconds it took me to put the other sandwich in the oven.

Please fire me. At my register this weekend, an old lady yelled at me because an item wouldn’t scan and upon telling her that I didn’t know why it was doing this, she promptly asked me what the point of me was. 

Please fire me. A woman came in looking for an item she put on hold earlier today. She “joked” with me that if I couldn’t find it she would come back with a gun. I never did find her hold.

Please fire me. Two guys came up to my register. Guy #1 looks at me and demands I print a gift receipt. I do so after the transaction is complete, hand him his change, and he says, “Is this the gift receipt?” I say yes and he responds with, ”Good girl.”

Please fire me. I was told off today for apparently discussing my sex life with customers. The person who reported me was a man I refused for a date.

Please fire me. I’ve repeated the phrase “No, we won’t have the iPhone 6 until the day it comes out” about 75 times today. Guess where I work?