Please fire me. Six weeks into my employment at a call center, my boss had a monthly 1on1 with me and started talking about some comments he’d heard that I’d made, and he ended with “we don’t want this to become an HR moment.” The comments in question were at orientation, staged by HR on my first day, about a video on workplace behavior, and half of the things said were by the two HR personnel themselves about how cheesy this video (transferred from worn-out VHS to DVD, it was that old) was. So I believe HR knows already, thanks.
Please fire me. Temptation is winning. I’m on the edge of taking part in the most scandalous affair EVER.
Please fire me. My coworker (who is 15 years older than me) is obsessed with me and won’t take my hints that he needs to leave me alone. He talks freely to our coworkers about how much he’s in love with me, and they take every opportunity to make fun of me for it. His offers for us to “hang out” all have red flags but he covers his ass just enough that I would look like a child if I complained to a supervisor.
Please fire me. My boss was angry that we were opening and eating bags of chips on work desks, yet when she wanted something for us to do on the weekend, she doesn’t hesitate to bring a box full of doughnuts (glazed and full of toppings) to our work desks.
Please fire me. They asked if I was good with technology…then gave me a bunch of computer cables to untangle and sort.
Please fire me. I work with a bunch of PhD doctors who never spent a day in medical school. And when I ask why my job gives me a migraine they tell me I should see a doctor!
Please fire me. My boss is convinced she can download other people’s youtube videos straight from youtube and suggests bringing back my predecessor whenever I tell her this is impossible.
Please fire me. My boss started my performance review by saying he isn’t sure if I brush my hair in the mornings.
Please fire me. My bosses are more concerned about me being 1 minute late than making sure the equipment I have to use to do my job is working.